Chapter 91

Do Unto Others...

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Today's Empowering Quote
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"Kindness it is that brings forth kindness always."
-Sophocles (447 B.C.)

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Today's Empowering Question
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"Could I gain greater cooperation right now by showing genuine kindness and respect than by demanding it?"

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Today's Fast Session
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A couple days ago, I was watching 'Santa Claus is Coming To Town' with my three year old son, and I noticed an important principle of life playing out.

In the story, the village dictator (the Burgermeister) had outlawed toys because he had fallen on a toy and broken his leg.  No child was to play with any toys or they would be locked up.

Well, Kris Kringle (a.k.a. Santa Claus) was delivering toys to all the kids, so he was branded an outlaw.  Public Enemy #1.

When Kris confessed to giving the town's children a bunch of toys, he was to be arrested.  In a flash of quick thinking, he presented the Burgermeister with a toy--a yo-yo.

For a moment, the Burgermeister began playing with the yo-yo, reminiscing about his youth, until he was reminded that he was breaking his own law.  This gave Kris an opening to escape...

...into the forest, which was the home of The Winter Warlock, who captured Kris.

Again, Kris gave him a toy--a choo-choo train.  This kind act melted the heart of the warlock, who let Kris go.

Isn't this how it usually happens in your life?

If you aren't the type, yet, who can inspire the cooperation of others because your kindness makes people want to help you and be around you, then it's time to try ...And even get good at it.

But before you do, think back. And look around.

Who gets the admiration and support of others?  Who do people work harder for? Is it the one who brings in the doughnuts for co-workers occasionally, the one who asks respectfully or the one who rants and raves that nothing gets done?

Who would you work harder for?

To make this easier to see, imagine how you would like to be asked (not told) to do something.

Isn't it easier to take when you're asked to drop what you're doing, if the person says something like this?:

"I know you're busy and this looks important, however I need to ask you a big favor. Could you...?" Or,

"I wonder if I could ask you to take a few minutes to help me with this...?" Or,

"I know you've got a lot to do, and I don't want you to get behind on account of me, but I have to ask you to..."

Man, wouldn't you like to hear that?

What do you hear from the people who make your blood boil?

Things like:

"Get in here, I need your help!"
"You're working OT today, so cancel any plans you have."  "Get doing your homework now!"
"I need a ride and I have to be there in 15 minutes."

Boy, that makes me want to blow a gasket. How about you?

Also, this can be extended to times when we make mistakes. Let's say someone made a big boo-boo. Of course, they get called on it.  The boss, co-worker, spouse, whoever it may be loses their temper.  They don't care why the mistake was made.

What do most people do?  They deny responsibility, of course!

Aaarrrgh!

Mistakes are not death sentences.  They're truly chances to see where your weaknesses are... golden opportunities to identify what you need to work on to make your health, your business, your relationships and your finances better.

But what do most of us do?

"It wasn't me!!  The copier was broken.  They didn't return my call.  I was stuck in traffic." Etc.

Try this.  When you make a big blunder, whether you're alone or if someone else catches it, immediately admit it...

...Immediately. Gracefully.

This takes the wind out of the sails of the person who wants to pounce you.  If you admit a mistake before it's even noticed by others, they'll likely react in a way
that's only about 10-20% as strong as they would if you deny it or blame your circumstances for the error.

And...

Try not to repeat it. And smile. Because you can do this.

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Today's Winning Beliefs
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-- When I want to feel good, I make someone else feel good
-- I treat others how they want to be treated
-- My relationships are getting better today
-- I like people and they like me back
-- I learn from mistakes and avoid them in the future.

 

 

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